Update: On Class Hiatus

So, I missed a Thursday class a few weeks ago- I was tired, or had plans, or something. The following week, my car nearly broke down and needed transmission work. Just breaking down a transmission itself is quite a time-consuming process... then they had to figure out what was wrong with it... order the parts... fix something else that my car had been recalled for that I'd forgotten about... fix the transmission... put it all back together. There was a big week-long event in town the first week, so car rental prices were absurd. By the second, I'd gotten used to just getting a ride to/from work and saved car rental money. But I had to miss two weeks of classes, on top of the Thursday I'd missed.

Had I gone back to class, they were just working on the demo I wouldn't get to be in, and I'd be quite behind on learning the moves. And after the demo, class is pretty much over. I've also found a new hobby I'm adoring, so I've decided to just go on hiatus until the next ballet season starts in the fall. That doesn't mean I'm not working at home; I'm just not going to class.

There's another reason as well. Remember the injury my silly self got by overdoing splits? I'm still injured. It doesn't hurt to move or anything, but the slightest stretching and I can totally feel it. I've decided I want that to heal totally before doing anything major with it. (I'm reading Dancing Through It by former NYCB principal dancer Jenifer Ringer, and one of her teachers told her, when she was injured, "The slower the recovery, the faster you recover", or something very similar. The book is fantastic, BTW. I just covered many pages while at the doctor's office today. I highly recommend it!)

And honestly, I haven't done a ton of ballet lately besides tendus, rond de jambes, other barre work- with a big exception: I've been going plie crazy! I noticed the slightest hint of extra muscle definition in my legs recently, and it has spurred me to do at least a little exercise every day. I like doing my plies in fifth, so I will usually do 15 on one leg here and then a little later do the other side, and keep doing that throughout the evening, or during the day if it's the weekend.

I also do a lot of leg lifts towards the back (ballet term not coming to me) to work on my butt, focusing on keeping my legs turned out. I do tendus and rond de jambes. I do a lot of ankle rolls and foot doming (many times throughout the day, every day) to work on my ankle strength. I do releves, including releves with either leg in passe (working on turnout!) I do this exercise every night on my problematic, non-turning-out, tibial torsioned leg. I do arabesques and other things. Occasionally, I do an online class. Non-ballet-style: all four on the floor, left leg up behind me then bring back down, also to work on my rear.

And I finally got nearly everything I need to make my rotation disks! I may have mentioned this before, but at my job, they install speakers. To install speakers in a box, they have to cut out circles. (The circles aren't perfect- it's difficult to cut a perfect circle with the tools they use... I mean it's perfectly circular but there's an extra cut in them that makes them kinda unsellable... maybe... hmmm....) They were going to throw away quite a few, so I grabbed them and came home and was able to nearly finish one. I can use it now, just the top is not attached. Getting the other screws and washers I need will be one of this weekend's projects!

One other thing: I realized last night that even though I don't really want to stretch my injured leg much at all, I can still stretch the rest of my body, even my other leg (duh!). So I am going to start stretching again, possibly yoga. (It's too bad I wasn't injured on my right leg. That one's naturally more flexible, and I could have worked on the left one catching up, but oh well!)

So that's where I'm at these days. Still loving ballet. Kinda regretting already not getting right back into class- I don't know where I will be placed when I go back (the girls should all be moving up a level), but either way is okay with me.

I might not be posting as often as I was, but I'm still "into" ballet and haven't lost my motivation as I'd feared I would. (Well, a touch, but not to where I am going to stop.) I'm still finding gorgeous photos online and will still be sharing those!

Surviving Parent's Night, Today's Success at Discipline

Parent's Night
Just a quick note: my ballet practice today went wonderfully. Actually, let me back up: parent's night was lovely as well. My mom did attend, which was fun, and there weren't really but a couple of other parents there (including one with a super nice camera... please don't post my splits online or anywhere!) I messed up on quite a few things, but that was okay. We also have another adult, which makes for three of us now!

We go over terminology over and over and over again in class. For some reason, these kids just can't pick up the one-word definitions of "frappe", "petite", "degage", etc. I still have a few I mix up (frappe is one, actually), but for the most part, I know all of the definitions. So much of class, we all just stand there while the instructor calls out on of the kids who she knows struggles with the definitions, and we wait while the little girl (or boy) stands there doe-eyed as she pries the definition out. This happens with nearly every single movement we do. Tendus: "what does tendu mean?... Anyone... ***....? .................." Petite battements: "what does tendu mean?... Anyone... ***....? .................." On and on and on. It really eats up class time, and is a bit frustrating at times. I want to make these kids flashcards or something. I would, if I thought they might use it.

Anyway, on parent's night this time (this didn't happen previously), we barely went over any terms! Maybe two or three total! And it was wonderful! I worked so hard because instead of stopping so much for so long, we just went from movement to movement to movement. I was far more sore the day after than I usually am! I can't wait for all our classes to be like that!

I had my mom record a few of the movements I still have problems with, like the body positions. I haven't checked those out yet, but I nearly have them down. We are supposed to do a demonstration at the end of the ballet year. Positions are one of my lesser concerns, because it's very easy to sneak peaks at what the other students do, without being too out of sync. Unlike with, say, pas de bourree, where if you mess up and go the wrong way, it's super obvious.

Today's Practice (at home)
So today, I wasn't at all sure what I was going to do, or if I was even going to do any practice. I was doing some plies at my barre and decided what the heck, I'd get dressed and work some. Practice went so well. I just made up my own routine, and listened to some of the classical music I have. I did quite a few plies and tendus- I went through those two or three times on both sides. Especially with the tendus: they are easy enough to do... but I wanted to work on actually leading with my heel and keeping my foot on the floor as long as possible before bringing it up so my toe was on the ground.

Rond de jambes: I worked on really getting that turnout. The movement seems so easy, but it's difficult for me to remember to turn out as soon as I possibly can and as much as I possibly can.

Frappes: Worked on these as well. With my frappe, I think I flex my foot too much when it's at my ankle. My instructor recently told me to strike the foot farther out, so I worked on that and smoothly brushing it on the floor before coming up. This one's a little hard to do on carpet!

Chasses: I've almost had down our chasses in class- we do them a certain way, in a certain order. But I've also been struggling with these. I've understood the direction we had to move, but it wasn't making sense to me what foot crossed in front when. And then our instructor said something last class that gave me an "aha!" moment: the first half, the left foot is chasing the right and the second half, the right chases the left. With just that short description, I now have the movement down pretty well.

[Description: Start in 5th, right foot in front, arms down in preparatory. Plie. Glide forward (in plie), leading with the right foot, bringing arms up to first (fingers at naval... I just looked this up and realized my arms have been too high!). Quickly bring left foot back to fifth (in the back). With right foot, glide into second plie, arms out. Close to fifth (prep arms), this time with right leg in back. Now reverse that, using the left foot to lead and going to the left instead of right. (See, I kept trying to put the wrong foot in back when gliding into second.)

There are two ways we do this, both actually have an extra step that what I said above: à terre and en l'air. In à terre, before closing the non-leading foot to fifth, we tendu the non-working leg. So if I'm going forward with right foot, I'll glide forward, tendu back with my left leg, and quickly close. Glide right, tendu with left leg, close left foot in front. Glide back with right foot, tendu left foot to the front, snap it back to fifth in front. En l'air is the same, except we dégagé instead of tendu.]

Adagio: Finally (after doing my chasses over and over and over again), I went on to our adagio. We do this one both at the barre and in center. It's a passe through retire then the working leg extends up (grande battement?) and then releve (rise up on our standing leg). It's done front, side, back, side. At the barre, instead of passe, we petite battement, sous-sus (feet jump up- releve- in a tight fifth position), spot, and turn. I practiced that one last week. I was having a lot of trouble getting down what happened after the back, and now I have that one nailed- and my spotting has improved as well! (When in center, instead of spotting and turning around, we [try to] stay in releve, do a few short port de bras, then close in the opposite fifth and do it all on the other leg. )

Our adagio has been really difficult for me! I mentioned we do it à terre AND en l'air (in the air)... and I've barely even been able to do just à terre! So today, I did it over and over again- almost totally in the air. I've still got a long way to go, but I'm more or less able to do the movements without having to put my foot down so much for balance.

In summary (I think I am a bit over-explanatory sometimes... I used to write A LOT but now this blog is pretty much the only writing I do nowadays. I hope to improve as I continue on), I'm super proud of myself because today, I showed a lot of discipline! Not just that, but I was totally in the zone doing it. Sometimes I can try things but have my mind elsewhere, wanting to be doing other things. Sometimes the music that came on wasn't fitting for whatever I was doing, so I either turned it off for a while or I just ignored it (instead of allowing myself to become distracted by trying to find the perfect music or something). Today, I was disciplined! Here's to more of that in the future, and more often!

Now to nail my pas de bourres! I was only just starting to get the hang of the two we've been doing, and now there are two more! Slowly, I can do them. But when we are in center, we do all four in a row, and my feet start getting tangled up! I can do this, though. My boyfriend is convincing me I should, indeed, do the demonstration/performance at the end of the ballet year in May... and I think I just might. I think it's just the encouragement I need to really work hard to improve!

Taking a mini-break from exercise...

I'm taking a mini-break from today's practice. It's gone well- I've kept myself motivated, which I have been having trouble with. I've had to remind myself that this is fun, not just exercise. (If I view anything as exercise, it becomes a drag and I hate it!)

I didn't do much of a warm-up, but Tamra's classes start slow. I did her Lesson 4: Barre, except a few things at the end, I believe she worked on grande battements, and I didn't do those. I don't think I've even done any of the online classes since starting actual classes (which reminds me- I need to cancel my DanceFlix subscription for now, since I haven't been doing those either). I definitely see improvements in what I can do now versus what I could do before starting live classes!

So I worked my way through those, then I started in on a couple of things I'm having trouble with in class: my arabesques, and ah, our grand battements(??), I think they are. (From fifth, passe to retire, then do a leg extension as high as you can, tendu, close.) With the arabesques, I've been having trouble getting my arms right for where my standing leg is. First arabesque has the arm on the standing leg's side extended, and third arabesque has both hands in the air, but the standing leg side is higher than the working leg. I've been switching those around. So I worked on that quite a bit, and I think I've got the hang of it.

I worked on that second exercise mostly for one reason: after we've done front, side, back, we go back to the side but instead of finishing the same way, our leg is raised (damn, I need to make these flashcards I found online), plie, sous-sus, spot, turn, plie, fifth, immediately repeat the regular exercise. I've been trying to just finish the exercise, forget we are supposed to plie, sous-sus and turn, so by the time I've gotten my body facing the other direction, I forget what the hell we are supposed to be doing, so I miss a few beats catching up, which often totally throws me off. But now: now I think I've got it. I practiced over and over, mostly the part right before and after the turn.

In summary: I've brushed up on my arabesques (and also practiced holding them) and worked on spotting while turning today.

Now to stretch. Let's see how that split's going...

Parent's Night, Remembering Class

So my last class proved to be quite different from normal classes. I somehow skipped the memo that it was parent's night. (I think it was actually on the paper that we were given something-something-parent's-something-parking-parent's, whatever, it didn't seem to pertain to me at the time.) I was settling in on the floor as the girls were positioning themselves, and I was starting in on my ankle rolls (god, those still hurt!) and the parent's were coming in and sitting in the chairs. "Is it parent's night?" I asked my little red-headed friend. She nodded her head. "Oh! I'm a little nervous now!" I told her, and she giggled at me.

So there we were, on the floor under the barre, doing our ankle rolls, myself towering above all the others (and I'm not in bad shape, but when surrounded by little nine-year-olds with pretty much no fat on their bodies, I look like a big, fat giant next to them!) One of the parents is staring at me, and I stare back at her, but it was an odd stare standoff because I knew she was staring and she knew I knew she was staring but she wasn't quite making eye contact with me, just staring at my face somewhere. While still staring at me, she asked the instructor something, who replied "oh, no, she's a student!" and then they kept talking, but too low for me to hear, and the lady kept staring at me! So that was a little awkward and I'd love to know what was said. At least one of the other parents looked impressed and said something about "exercise", but that was all I heard. All in all, I'm really glad there were no fathers there, because I would definitely have felt awkward.

I happened to have on my most modest leotard, thank goodness, and I'd also not forgotten to put on my silicone nipple covers (I just ordered more- those are sooooo handy! My first class got very weird when I noticed my nipples were shining through). I even had on a sports bra I usually don't wear, because the wide crossed straps in the back are obvious, but on this night I was glad for the extra modesty. (Don't get me wrong, I'm never ever dressed inappropriately- I won't even wear a camisole, remember? But a couple of leotards are a little lower in the front, which only proves a slight problem when we lay on the floor for our back exercises, and I have to be sure to pull the neck up a touch or the slightest cleavage will show.) I'd also happened to take a bit of extra anxiety medication, so it didn't go too bad.

I did get called out a little more than normal, but that was okay- I was doing things incorrectly. I kinda blew a few things in the center. When we do center, I usually have to follow the one girl who is very good, or another one of the girls if she isn't in front of me. The slower movements like our arabesques go fine enough, but with the faster-paced things (like pas de bourres), it can take me a few beats to figure out what we are doing. On this night, though, it took me more than  a few beats when I messed up, and I had more trouble than usual on center. But I didn't let it bring me down! I was glad when class was over, though, and made my way out quickly after curtseying to our wonderful instructor.

So today is Saturday and I am trying to go through in my head what we do in class and write it down so I can work on it. I know we do plie, tendu, degage... and then the order gets hazy for me. I do know we also do ronde de jamb and frappes... and then it gets very hazy. I'm thinking we do passé developpe but there is also something before that, two somethings I can't quite think of... Oh, awesome. I'd been looking at that linked video in a playlist and came across one of the movements: it's just a passé. So that comes before the passé developpe. Now for the other I can't remember. It's like the passé but our leg doesn't come up into retire. So I'm just missing one for barre (although I'm not sure the proper preparation for each of them), and our last one is, I believe, an echappe sous-sus? It's done facing the barre, 1) spring up from fifth to sous-sus 2) spring back down to fifth 3) echappe? (both feet go out away from each other) 4) spring back down to opposite fifth... spring up, don't change fifth, spring out, change fifth, etc.

Center, of course, gets more difficult, and it changes up. But I know we do: our arabesques, positions of the body on stage, the echappe sous-sus or whatever we do at the barre but in the center, and our port de bras, which I allllmost have down. I'm going to try those today because I like them and I really want to have them down without having to watch the other girl. (I'm sorry, friend! I know it must be awkward to constantly have a grown-up staring at you and trying to follow along, especially if you make a mistake that's highlighted because two of us are doing it!)

So yep, that's where I'm at today. Still not having time to practice every night, but I'm working on getting more and more stretching and/or exercises in during the week.

Today: Stretching & Strengthening

I have done so little lately in terms of strengthening that I can totally tell. Grande plies are a bitch right now- I struggle with them again. I'm starting back with randomly doing pliés, relevés, and uh, I don't know if it's a ballet move but it's a développé derrière skipping the attitude positions- so like a back leg raise to target my glutes, basically. (I'm a bit afraid that doing as many of these as I like to do may actually hinder my développé derrières due to building so much muscle, and due to the fact that I actually do it a little outwards instead of straight back because it seems to work my glutes more, but the payoff is proving to be a much firmer ass, and so it's worth it to me to work on these. I do need to work more on keeping my extended leg straight, as that doesn't come naturally in that position.)

Basically, since I've started taking actual classes, my work outside of class has dwindled. I do try to arrive an hour early to stretch before class, and sometimes to have some of the girls help me out with some movements, and I also try to stay at least 20-30 minutes after class stretching some, but otherwise I haven't been doing as much as I was, and that needs to change.

I have stopped working the classes I was doing online. I really want to focus on strength and stretching right now- and working on learning the movements in class as quickly as I can, because those are what I want to be practicing at home. I almost have them down to where I will feel comfortable practicing at home, but I'm not quite there yet: I'm afraid of practicing and getting a movement down well, only to be in class and realize I've been doing it wrong. But I am picking things up pretty well, and that will soon be an option for me.

I'm focusing a lot on stretching right now, after doing the warmup I usually do (which I have mostly memorized, so it's also what I do when I first get to the studio and get changed from work clothes). I'm quit excited because even though two of my splits are still embarrassingly high, one of them, my left side split, is actually making noticeable progress! I'm not to the ground yet, and am still inches away from it, but less than a foot, I think, and that's a big difference for me!

So yep, back to it!

Oh, edit! I just wanted to say that when I first started, leg raises/releves were kinda difficult for me- I mean, well, they are hard.  When I first started, I would do about 12-15 one-legged relevés (usually with the other leg in sur le cou-de-pied or retiré) and 30 relevés in a set. Now I'm up to somewhere like 60-100 relevés and I've doubled my one-legged retirés, doing 25-30+ each set. (And I guess I've been doing enough lately, because even with some weakening, I am still able to do these with some ease.)

Struggling with Leg Extensions?

Who isn't struggling with leg extensions, if you're into dong ballet? It's damn hard to get legs up in the air like that!

If you're a newbie like me, you may be using the wrong muscles! I had a feeling I was, and then I came across a forum thread that totally changed how I'll be doing leg extensions from now on, because I was indeed using the wrong muscles!

I've read about how you're not supposed to use your quads when lifting the leg. For awhile, I didn't even bother trying to figure out this concept because it sounded kinda foreign. Then I happened across that post, worked through sort of like how a poster explained it, and now I can lift my leg (my right one, anyway) without using my quad so much!

I did a modified version of what was said: do a leg extension. (I did mine to the side.) Now hold it there. Hold it there for TOO long. Hold it there until your quad gives out. When your quad gives out (I had a sensation of it relaxing), the correct muscles automatically kick in, and voila! Just like that, you're using the right muscles!

So simple to do! You're welcome :)

Now height? You're on your own for that! I'm so inflexible, and am sure that I will compare myself to the young ladies I will be doing ballet with- who are 26 years younger than me and likely just naturally more flexible than I have ever been. I'll have to really work on catching myself when I compare myself, or it will totally bring me down, as it did awhile back (when I was focusing so much on my imperfections- my poor turnout, my tibial torsion- that it dragged me into this darkness where I wasn't enjoying ballet anymore). But I will be diligent in catching myself before getting dragged down, I will be diligent in working on improvements, and I will be diligent in stretching and strengthening to the best of my body's abilities.

Lifting Hips in Développé?

I've been struggling with not lifting my hips when doing développés. It seems like it CAN possibly be done, because it seems I am able to do it while on the floor, without gravity to bring me down. This article is interesting because it says that the hips are supposed to be lifted using the iliopsaos, not the quads. (It also has videos to go along with all of the seven exercises for leg extensions.)

I tried the "Thigh lift" last night and my iliopsaos was very elusive.

Then I came across this link while researching how to get my leg up higher. It's a video, inviting comments, of a ballet class DVD preview taught by Dmitri Roudnev (he's the one posting). He states it might be controversial, so of course I have to watch it:

The comments to his post bring up the fact that he teaches his students to lift the hips when performing extensions, instead of telling them to keep their hips straight like I've been hearing and reading. The first comment I see sums up the argument against what he is doing:

I just cannot fathom how it is beneficial; surely by teaching it in this way (referring to the developpe at 90) you are teaching the movement pattern of lifting the hip of the gesture/working leg to initiate the extension rather than developing strength and control in the legs, postural muscles and rotators etc?

 Here's Dmitri's explanation:

I believe the alignment should be the first priority in ballet training. Turn out is second priority. 

I believe for progressive training that 180 turn-out in all five positions are a must ( my school, the Bolshoi, believes the same, as well as many professionally oriented schools in the world ) At the same time, in order to keep the alignment correct, I believe the turn-out of the working leg should not be forced. 

The student in the video is a beginner ( 2 classes per week ). The video shows how much this beginner student is able to rotate the leg in a la second. It is a temporary look and it will change and improve as soon as she gets stronger.

So basically, he's saying it's okay to lift the hip as a beginner, that the beginner needs to develop the strength first, before working on keeping the hips lower and more turned out. To me, this makes sense (not just because I want it to!). For instance, I am working on my turnout, still. But just because I don't have perfect turnout doesn't mean I can't practice ballet. I work with the turnout I have, and also work on strengthening my hip rotators so I can increase my turnout. Likewise, he is saying nothing should be forced; build strength first and then the improvements in turnout, extension, will necessarily be improved so long as one is working on strengthening those areas.

I also came across this link, basically sayings screw all that, lift your hips for extension! And it posts quite a few photos of professional ballerinas doing leg extensions with their hips lifted. Such as these two:

Sylvie Guillem, former top-ranking dancer with Paris Opera Ballet, principal guest artist with the Royal Ballet in London

Students at Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis school, ABT's pre-professional division

 I just found a bunch more here:

So, I'm going to stop stressing so much over my lifted hips when I'm doing leg extensions. Honestly, they're hard enough as it is without my beating myself up over it. (They're one of those things that if I were to get focused on, I'd slide down into not wanting to continue ballet.) So, yes, I recognize that my ilipsaos needs to be a helluva lot stronger. I can't even isolate it at the moment. And I do think continuing to do floor barre may help me learn to isolate the right muscles. But when it comes to following along with the videos I watch, eh, I'm just going to do the best I can and that's going to have to be that. I can't control it right now, so, like I said, I'm not going to beat myself up over it.

I do find it interesting all the different ways I'm learning that ballet instructors can teach things. I didn't understand how there could be all sorts of different techniques when I started. I'm starting to get it now though ;)

Later today, I am off to the mountains with my dog, my friend, and his two dogs! I'm bringing all my ballet gear (well, I can't take my barre unfortunately!) and plan to hike, relax, read, and of course, do ballet. That's my next four days summed up (I hope!)

"Floor Barre", Leg Extensions & Hips

I read a great article awhile back (I may have linked to it before, pdf), entitled "Functional Anatomy in Dance Training: An Efficient Warm Up Emphasizing the Role of the Psoas". In it is this picture, which has stuck in my mind since reading it:

Développé à la seconde. Incorrect placement of hip in left photo. Hip is raised. Corrected in the middle photo. Incorrect use of glutes in the third.

I've been working on this while doing ballet lately. I was pretty much convinced that a) my hips and legs just don't work like that or b) the only way I would ever be able to understand how to get my hips and legs like that would be one-on-one instruction from a professional.

Then I read a post (on one of the ballet forums) about floor barre. Apparently, the term "Floor Barre" is a registered trademarked technique that you may be able to find classes for, though they don't seem to be common in smaller cities. But- you should know me by now!- I'm not going to worry about flying or driving to some other city to learn Floor Barre. I'm going to teach myself! (So we'll say I'm just borrowing the term, uncapitalized,  to describe what I am doing, and it should not be taken to mean that I have ever had any class on the trademarked technique of "Floor Barre".)

A couple of nights ago, I decided to give my own version of floor barre a shot. I wanted to work on those things in the photo above. And what do you know? When I lie on my back I am able to bring my leg forwards and sideways without moving my hips! (It's so much easier to work on when all that pesky gravity isn't making extensions so difficult to do!) So now I know that my hips will allow my legs to raise properly; it can be done. My goal is to work on this while on the floor and hopefully gain muscle memory so I can perform the actions correctly while standing. I'm not quite sure what I'm doing differently, but with practice, I hope to understand (and be able to DO!).